


[Jinglebellselu reposted entry] Of Presents, Hugs and Kisses

by BlingBlingMaknae



Category: EXO (Band)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Kindergarten & Pre-school, Christmas Fluff, Christmas Party, Fluff, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-06-05
Updated: 2018-06-05
Packaged: 2019-05-18 11:08:23
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 8,340
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14851596
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/BlingBlingMaknae/pseuds/BlingBlingMaknae
Summary: Little Sehun is a smart kid. He knows more than what toddlers his age are supposed to understand but his clammy, jittery hands could not even give his own gift for his beloved cherub.





	[Jinglebellselu reposted entry] Of Presents, Hugs and Kisses

**Author's Note:**

> Original link (because i didnt know how to post on ao3 before) on jinglebellselu's account: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13002804

Original prompt (prompt #134):

"Luhan is the most popular kid on their kindergarten, so he received many presents on their little Christmas party; however, he didn't recieved a gift from the persone he loves.  
Sehun wants to give Luhan his present, but he's too shy since he is insecure."

\--------

 

Little Luhan has it all.

 

He is the dream son of each and every parent along the block. A handsome— _more like beautiful_ —kid with manners and skills, he is the golden child in the kindergarten. No, it could be said that he is the favorite _everywhere_ he sets his tiny feet on. One should be heartless enough to not love such a sweetheart like Luhan, who people often think of as a cute cherub that the skies blessed the world with.

His fluffy black tuff of curly hair, doe-like eyes, cute button nose, apple cheeks, tender lips, naturally warm vibe and his squishy, little body make the kids in their kindergarten wonder if he is missing his wings, because he is basically an angel they could not help but admire. He can be mistaken as a child star by the aura of sophistication he naturally exudes despite not being born into an aristocratic family. He is always neat, courtesy of his parents’ efforts to make him presentable despite not being among the richest people living in the neighborhood.

The kid’s bag is always filled with baby wipes, a roll of tissue, baby powder and a comb to tend himself whenever he becomes dirty from playing. His school supplies are also complete and he often shares his pad paper to his classmates if they have none. Once, he gave out like half of what remained in his pad paper, causing his parents to scold him for being too nice that nothing was left for him. He does the same with his food, sharing even the last morsel of his sandwich and the last sip of his favorite taro bubble tea to his classmates. He behaves in a prim and proper and shows respect to elders, causing them to coo to the child and fall for his charms.

Luhan is one of the smartest kids in the kindergarten, third to his richest classmate Kim Joonmyeon and the cute, owl-eyed boy Do Kyungsoo. Maybe it is because of his love for reading, using some of his leisure time back at home to read books from his parents’ mini library or his habitual practice of asking his parents a lot of “whys” and “hows.” Along with Kim Minseok, his chubby and adorable best friend, they are the most athletic children as seen on how fast they run during their ‘tag’ games and whenever they are playing with a soccer ball in the central park near the kindergarten.

Luhan isn’t exactly the sociable type, but at least, he is heeding to his parents’ advice of getting out of his shell and interacting with others. Before, he was this shy, quiet deer who meekly sat in his seat on the first day during his first year in the kindergarten but having garnered enough attention for being one of the prettiest and downright adorable kids as days progressed, he gradually became everyone’s friend. His best friend turned out to be Minseok, though. He finds it hard to deal with Chanyeol, Baekhyun, Jongdae, Tao and their loud mouths, Joonmyeon and Yixing’s maturity for their age, Kyungsoo and Jongin’s somewhat blunt and snarky attitude, Kris’s weirdness, and Sehun’s silence.

Speaking of Sehun, that kid is the only one who seems to be not swooned by Luhan’s charms. He is the only person Luhan knows that does not seem to find the Chinese deer special. For some reason, Oh Sehun apparently shuns him by the way he never approached Luhan. All the kids are flocking around Luhan whenever the Chinese deer brings a new toy or wears clothes that look like designer brands, but Sehun always stays in a secluded corner, basking in his own world. His attention is always immersed in any of the books he brings with him, which the other kids find boring because they are basically about branches of science that children will often find uninteresting at their age. He is fond of reading literature books, too, which Chanyeol once pointed out as dull and pointless because they have no pictures. Thinking that little Sehun is merely practicing how to read the words, their homeroom teacher once asked him if he knew what the poem, a romantic poem by a famous poet in particular, means, and Sehun mumbled some explanation that the other kids found too hard to understand despite the simple words the evidently smart kid used.

Surprisingly, Joonmyeon and Yixing cannot understand what the books say even if they seem the most mature pair out of all the pupils in their class. Luhan often thinks how Sehun is not the first in their honor roll; perhaps, he is too preoccupied with all those books and that he is not interested with matters that he finds too childish, even if they are technically still kids.

Sehun is that one handsome kid who has a severe lack of friends. Kris, even though he is weird and hard to comprehend sometimes, has friends, but Sehun, despite not being really _that_ out of this world, does not have one permanent friend in the kindergarten. It seems that he is so done with his classmates’ immaturity— _which is supposed the way kids should behave, to be honest_ —that he opts to stay huddled in a corner with his books and his pink plushie, Pinku Pinku. He barely talks with the other kids, and when he does, they quickly back away because he often wears a poker face that scares them. His eyes emanate a cold aura and when he stares at someone, intentionally or not, he appears to be aloof and unfriendly. The kid does not seem to see it as a problem, as shown by his lack of effort to reach out to others.

Luhan, too, is afraid to talk with Sehun. How could he, if one stare at Sehun’s direction, he feels his face heat up? Little Luhan once tried to talk with Sehun by extending his hand for a handshake when they became seatmates, but Sehun merely looked at him with his intimidating stare. Luhan remembers drawing his hand back awkwardly, muttering a hushed “sorry” for disturbing Sehun in the drawing the slightly taller kid was making that day.

Luhan does not know why, but despite the rude first impression of his seatmate _,_ he finds him rather interesting. Despite being devastated by the first ever rejection he experienced, Luhan could not bring himself to cry, too mesmerized on the way the snobbish kid moved his eyes across the page of a book. _He looks so intelligent,_ the little cherub thought, and he found himself stealing glances at Sehun ever since that day. He actually wants to try talking with Sehun again, or perhaps, win his friendship by giving him sweets like what he often does with the other kids, but the fear of being rejected again holds him back. Besides, he does not mind leaving Sehun alone if he can snag the chance to silently gape in awe at the other’s cool demeanor.

 

He once asked his mother, “mama, what does it mean when Lulu’s heart thumps his chest too fast like he played soccer all day?” The pouting child tugged his mother’s dress with a pleading look. “Is Lulu sick? Will Lulu die?”

His mother answered him with a teasing smile and tone that caused the kid to be flustered. “Lulu won’t die. He is not sick. It probably means that he likes someone. Oh, does my Xiao Lu have a crush on some pretty girl?”

 

His little mind could not grasp the concept of having a crush at that time, but as time passed, he concluded that the crazy somersaults of his heart and the heating of his face despite not having a fever were the symptoms of his growing attraction for Sehun.

 _But Sehunnie is a boy,_ he often whimpers to himself, pouting while getting frustrated. He planned to tell Minseok one day, but a tiny voice inside his head told him to keep the secret to himself. He does not plan telling his parents, too, because the smart kid he is, he knows what he is feeling is strange… _unique._ His parents are both male and female, making him think that he is one queer child.

 

 

 

Little Luhan has it all, _except Oh Sehun._

 

 

 

He is undeniably drawn to the cold little boy, and because Christmas is just around the corner, he promises himself to win Sehun’s heart by giving him the best present ever.

 

 

 

\--

Little Sehun is a shy kid.

 

In more ‘adult-ish’ terms, he is a socially inept kid who does not bother talking unless necessary. It does not help that he inherited the stern, slit-like eyes of his father, because he is intimidating without even doing anything. He is raised by parents who were topnotchers back in their college days, so he is often taught of intellectual things instead of the usual bed time stories he finds childish. If they read him stories or he does it himself, he prefers short stories, novels and poems. He does not mind if the book has no pictures; he actually thinks that images are a bother because more words could honestly be put on the space they occupy.

His parents and his brother act like their normal selves around him but still, they give heed of topics that should not befall an innocent child’s ears even if they know that Sehun will easily grasp the concept. For that reason alone, it can be said that Sehun is bound to be more matured than his peers.

He does not socialize that much. It isn’t that he hates the other kids; it is just that he finds it difficult to deal with their wavelength. He considers it a bother to be bombarded with the beagle line’s incessant noises. He is not comfortable with Kyungsoo staring at him with big, round eyes and with Jongin poking his cheek every now and then, that naughty child always earned a glare from. Kris is downright hard to understand and Tao is too whiny for his liking, while Joonmyeon and Yixing are too… matured. Yes, Sehun himself is matured, but not to the extent of the duo who acts like a mother and father to the kids whenever the teacher leaves them for a while. Also, he cannot understand how Minseok and Luhan can be giggly 24/7, particularly the Chinese deer.

For some reason, Luhan has a permanent smile painted across his face, brightening up the room with the invisible beams of sunlight his tiny body is emitting. Sehun was shocked that the kid befriended him, because the others, even the annoying trio in the room, were too scared to approach Sehun who was scowling deeply that one particular day. Sehun found himself looking back on his book, getting all awkward because of the unexpected friendly gesture from the deer. He sensed the deer pouting while drawing his hand back, and suddenly, Sehun wanted to reach out and hold the boy’s hand all day. Not wanting to embarrass himself, he refrained from doing so, though he could not deny that he began watching over Luhan since that day.

He joins the kids in their games even if they are often too childish for his liking. He does not bother tagging Chanyeol and Baekhyun whenever he is the ‘it,’ not wanting to hear them holler right on his ears and chase after him like he is some alien from the outer space. Though, once Luhan joins the games, Sehun gets all flustered and leaves the scene as soon as possible. He often catches the hurt stare and cute pout on Luhan’s face every time he does that, but how could he help it? He does not want to be embarrassing on front of the Chinese darling. He once did stay, however, because Luhan seemed that he would cry any second. _He probably thinks I hate him._ And that day, because his eyes remained glued on Luhan throughout the game, he got tagged a lot of times and even tripped on process of running. His ears grew red when Luhan was the first one to reach him, wanting to help him stand up. He could hear Chanyeol still laughing in the background, with Kyungsoo smacking the giant’s head to make him shut up. Not wanting to seem vulnerable in front of the boy’s eyes, he did not take the hand and stood shakily on his bruised legs as he trudged to the kindergarten’s entrance to wait for his mother.

He badly wants to talk Luhan. He wants Luhan to tell him stories about his life directly, not that Sehun is always eavesdropping whenever the deer is talking with Minseok. _Sometimes, only sometimes._

He wants to hug and squish Luhan’s cheeks like what the other kids are doing. He wants to hold his hand while walking to the playground. He wants to see Luhan smile at him and be the reason behind it. He wants to pull Jongin away from Luhan every time the other is subtly trailing behind Luhan like a tail, but what? Sehun is just an odd baby who thinks like an adult. He is just that someone who can be ignored for the rest of the day. Luhan is too good for him.

 

Oh Sehun is not a major loss anyway; Luhan has a lot of friends, right?

 

\--

“What are you going to give me, Baekkie?” Sehun overhears Tao asking Baekhyun over their snack time. It is a few days before their Christmas party, and as expected, the kids are asking one another who they picked during the name drawing for their Secret Santa event. Sehun internally rolls his eyes because _what is the sense of doing Secret Santa if they will spill everything?_ Well at least, Chanyeol, Baekhyun and Tao are the only ones who told everyone who they picked.

 

 

_Kids, really._

 

 

“Baekkie is going to give you roaches,” Chanyeol grins at the panda, causing the latter’s eyes to water while shaking his head. “No, no, I don’t wanna—“

“Goodness, Yeollie,” Joonmyeon massages his temple while giving the taller kid a glare which turns out to be cute. "Do not scare him, okay? We do not want to hear Tao cry all day.”

“Calm down, Tao-yah.” Luhan smiles at the whimpering panda, causing Sehun to contemplate whether he should be pissed that the smile is not directed towards him or if he is supposed to be mesmerized at the lovely glimmer in the boy’s eyes. “Baekkie is going to give you a nice present, right, Baek?”

Baekhyun nods at this, but then Jongdae suddenly says— _screams,_ “I want Luhannie to be my Secret Santa!”

Nods and noises of approval ring through the table, and in a blink of an eye, small little hands are tugging Luhan’s shirt.

“Lulu, who did you pick? Is it me? Is it me?” Their eyes are pleading Luhan to answer that it is one of them, and Luhan looks like he is in a dilemma. Maybe it is because he wants to follow the rule of the game, or it is because he is nearly falling from his chair from the multiple sets of hands that are tugging him. Only Kris, Joonmyeon, Yixing, Minseok and Sehun are not bothering Luhan, with the two matured kids plus Minseok declutching the kids’ hands from Luhan who looks like he will cry from having his shirt nearly ruined.

“L-Lulu cannot tell who he is,” Luhan says once everyone is back on their chairs. His face looks panicky when the other kids’ faces reflect their displeasure, so he sighs and waves his tiny hands around while saying, “but Lulu will give everyone a gift! Lulu promises!”

The kids cheer, clapping their tiny hands together, even Kris who is busy drawing another masterpiece, except Sehun who is spacing out.

“Luhannie is so kind,” Jongin grins, throwing his arm around the other’s shoulder that had Sehun’s blood boiling. The goofy boy quickly placed a big smooch on Luhan’s cheek while pulling him closer, and the blatant display of affection on front of Sehun’s eyes is too much to bear. His tiny hands squeeze around his almost empty bubble tea cup, but it goes unnoticed as the Yixing asks, “Xing wonders who picked Hannie’s name. Hannie deserves a great gift for being so nice throughout the year.”

Sehun visibly gulps at this, though the other kids are focused on Luhan’s pretty face who is obviously thinking who drew his name.

“Chen-Chen hopes that Santa will give lots of gifts for Hannie, like Santa did to me last year,” the troll beams with his incomplete set of teeth, but Joonmyeon cuts him, “Chen-Chen received a gift last year? But you are naughty the whole year! Why didn’t Santa give Myeonnie one?”

“Santa does not exist,” Kris deadpans, his eyes not moving away from the paper he is moving his artistic hands on. _At last, he said something that makes sense,_ Sehun mumbles under his breath before getting up to throw his empty— _crushed_ —cup in the trash bin. He is glad he left, because the table was soon filled with bickering about Santa’s existence, or the lack of it.

 

\--

 

“Oh Sehun.”

“Shhh.”

“Sehun-ah.”

“Cut it.”

“What—yah, I am your brother—“

“What is it, hyung?” Sehun looks up from his— _more like his brother’s_ —tablet in annoyance. The five year-old boy glares at his eight year-old brother who is taken aback at the cold look in his younger brother’s eyes. The elder sighs while pointing at the direction of the kitchen where their mother is, silently threatening the younger boy who merely rolled his eyes.

“Any day from now, I will surely tell Eomma how much you are disrespecting me,” the elder Oh mutters while taking a peek on his tablet. “What are you searching for, dongsaeng? It has been an hour since you borrowed my tablet and your ugly face is scrunched up ever since.”

The baby Oh does not answer, opting to scroll down the screen with his stubby fingers. He attempts to make the tablet face away from his brother but the latter is swift enough to grab the gadget from the smaller. Sehun stares with horror at his brother who starts cackling hysterically, even slapping his thigh while reading the writings on the screen.

“Omo, you are browsing Christmas catalogs?” Sehun’s elder brother laughs while scrolling down the screen. “What are you, an adult? This coat is more expensive than my possessions combined, Sehun-ah!”

 _What is even funny about it?_ “Hyung is exaggerating,” the younger shrugs while weakly punching his brother’s arm. “Give it back now.”

Turns out, his brother checked the whole browsing history and is soon laughing his heart out. “Love poems? Wedding rings? Seriously, Sehunnie?”

“Stop laughing or Sehunnie will tell Eomma hyung is bullying me,” Sehun frowns, but the elder merely answers, “like she will believe you. You are the one who is always hurting me.” The elder Oh clutches his chest dramatically that only made Sehun scoff. “Stop it, hyung.”

“Whoever this girl is,” _hyung, it is a boy more beautiful than girls,_ “I assure you that she would not understand what you are trying to convey. Those gifts are for adults, Sehunnie. Who in your age will understand poems? I myself cannot understand. About the wedding rings, it is too early to think of proposing!”

“Who will propose?” Mrs. Oh emerges from the kitchen, a tray of freshly baked gingerbread cookies on her hand. The two boys instantly lit up at the mouthwatering sight that is slowly but surely making its way towards them.

Mrs. Oh carefully lays the plate containing the cookies before setting the tray aside. Sehun’s brother, of course, tells their mother what the youngest Oh was browsing about.

“Sehunnie, you cannot give jewelries to kids,” Mrs. Oh cracks a smile at her pouting child. “Children your age do not know the essence of those things and cannot take care of them. What we need to buy for your friend is what children like you fancies, such as toy robots, teddy bears, coloring books…”

“Eomma, let me remind you that your youngest son does not know how to be his age.” Sehun’s brother sticks his tongue out to his younger brother who mirrors his childish action.

Mrs. Oh shakes her head at her children with a smile painting across her lips. She settles the tablet down while carrying her youngest son to sit on her lap. “Sehunnie, you are still five, baby. You may be our big little boy but you still need to know how children like you behave. How about Eomma joins you in shopping for your friend? Oh yes, let us shop for the whole class!”

“Um, Eomma, I am already a big boy—”

“Chocolate ice cream… ah, no, chocolate bubble tea. My treat.”

 

It does not take fifteen minutes for the youngest Oh to shower, get dressed and plead his mother to go.

 

 

 

It is supposed to be a cold weather, so why is little Sehunnie sweating too much? His hands are getting clammy inside his red, woolen gloves as he stares ahead the road. The air conditioner in the car is also mildly cold, so why is he feeling his body temperature rising? Oh right, according to the romantic novel he read the other day, the main character feels jittery and warm all over when her object of interest is the cause of her nervousness. So, according to Sehun’s understanding, he is anxious about how to hand Luhan his gift. He is scared; what if Luhan does not like his gift? What if he is not satisfied? What if Luhan is still upset because Sehun acted rude towards him?

“Be nice to them, okay?” Mrs. Oh pats her son’s head, whose morose expression cannot be hidden. She fixes the dark blue beanie of her son, smiling warmly at him who is pouting at her.

“Are you nervous, Sehunnie?” Mr. Oh asks from the driver’s seat, glancing at the rear view mirror to see his son wearing a sour expression on. “That friend of yours… Lu… Luhwa? Luna? _Luhaen?_ ”

“Appa, it is Luhan.” Soon, the car pulled over on front of the kindergarten. Mrs. Oh takes off their youngest son’s seatbelt as Mr. Oh continues talking.

“Oh, my bad. What I was saying is, Luhan will like it, my son. From your story, that kid is the nicest one in your class and he is a ball of sunshine. All you need to do is to put a big smile on your face and hand him the gift. Be friendly to everyone, baby. Socialize and enjoy your day.”

Mrs. Oh, carrying a paper bag full of presents for the other kids and the homeroom teacher, walks her son towards the kindergarten. She gives him a short lecture about not wearing his signature frown and to be a good, polite boy to everyone. She assists Sehun, going inside to lay the gifts on the table. Sehun gives his mother a soft peck on her cheek and the other did the same to her son before encouraging Sehun to play with the others.

 

 

 

Sehun is sweating profusely. He already took off his coat about an hour ago, but why? Why is he perspiring bullets in a room where is supposed to freeze? The answer comes in the form of a pretty, adorable deer standing at the other end of the room, arranging all the gifts together with their homeroom teacher who is cooing on Luhan’s outfit since the past hour. The beaming boy is clad in a Santa hat, fluffy white sweater with a big Bambi logo, jeans and winter boots, all articles of clothing a little bit bigger than his actual size, making him look more cuddly and charming. He is smiling the whole time he is arranging the gifts, with a handful of kids peeking every now and then to see if their names are on the gift wrappers.

The boy’s presence at the table is bothering Sehun so much. The teacher sweetly asked Sehun if all his gifts are already on the table, and the child answered ‘yes.’ Turns out that Sehun is tightly clutching his bag which is containing Luhan’s gifts while staring at the table with an uneasy gaze. How can he calm down if _all_ the gifts sitting on the table are wrapped in colorful wrappers and big boxes? He is certain that his gift is also the cheapest, most questionable and most unchristmassy. If he places his gift amongst the children’s gifts for Luhan, and surely all of them will laugh on how his present for Luhan is the worst.

Well apparently, his gifts for his classmates are the smallest in size, but he does not care. All he cares about is about Luhan’s reaction to his gift for him. He waited for this occasion to come so that he could apologize to the deer and for him to at least do something meaningful for Luhan. He prepared a lot for this one because it could make or break his chance to be Luhan’s friend. He did not waste five hours in the mall for nothing even if he hates shopping. He thought of what his Luhannie will like, and somehow, put his heart in the letter he wrote.

He sat stiff on his chair. He does not even realize that he is clinging on the hem of his red turtleneck throughout the hour. He does not even stir when Baekhyun and Jongdae, together with Chanyeol who is clad in a Santa Claus costume shouted ‘Merry Christmas’ right on his ear. He does not get annoyed hearing Tao singing English Christmas carols with his Chinese accent; does not bother to react after seeing Kris and Jongin steal food from the table while Yixing, Joonmyeon and Kyungsoo are dancing with the beagle line. His slit-like eyes are glued to a certain fluffy deer who is dancing with his hamster friend Minseok. Sehun himself is now dancing because Ms. Seo successfully convinced him, but his attention is definitely not on Tao who is swinging the Korean boy’s arms for the past fifteen minutes.

Sehun only got aware of his surroundings when the gift giving started. It is not a surprise that all the kids, despite not drawing Luhan for the Secret Santa, gave him gifts. Their adviser who gave all of them gifts has given Luhan a nicely wrapped present, too. All the children hand each other their presents, opening them the moment their hands lay on the wrapped boxes.

Some of them approached Sehun to tell him ‘thank you’ and to give him a kiss on his cheek for being kind even just once in that whole school year. Joonmyeon is thoughtful enough to give Sehun a gift even if what the latter did the whole year was snap and glare at the nice leader whenever Yixing and him check on him. Sehun gives Joonmyeon a shy smile, but that quickly dissipates when he sees Luhan sharing a hug with Minseok.

 _They are best friends,  just best friends,_ Sehun silently chants to himself. Yixing is sensible enough to pull Joonmyeon away once he sees Sehun gripping his backpack—which contains Luhan’s gift—in what he understands as jealousy. Luhan looks overjoyed to see Minseok gifting him a customized soccer jersey. He places a peck on his best friend’s baozi cheeks, pinching them afterwards.

 

 

But that is not what made Sehun want to flip tables.

 

 

It is when Jongin gives Luhan a gift: a PlayStation Vita. _The perks of being a son of a CEO,_ Sehun mutters to himself as he watches Luhan beaming at the expensive gift of the other child who obviously has interest at Luhan.

 

_Jongin: 1, Sehun: 0_

 

Sehun loses it when Jongin opens the present Luhan gave him. Whatever it was, it made Jongin do a happy dance before leaning to place a loud smack on Luhan’s cheek.

 

_Jongin: 2, Sehun: 0_

 

Sehun is too upset to realize that the boy of his dreams is making his way towards him. The Korean boy only did, when a large box is placed on front of his legs. It seems to be heavy, making him wonder what is inside. Luhan is grinning from ear to ear, making Sehun’s poor little heart knock against his chest.

“Lulu is Hunnie’s Secret Santa. Merry Christmas, Sehunnie,” the boy smiles, pushing his gift towards the stunned boy.

_He drew my name? Of all the kids, I was the lucky one he picked?_

Sehun’s mouth hung open, too shocked to register the information his little ears have just heard. He stares down the gift, with a small gift card with his name on it, and suddenly, a wave of anxiety washes over the Korean boy.

His own gift for his baby deer is nothing compared to what Luhan himself is giving him, as well as all his classmates’ presents for the Chinese deer. Sehun is distressed. Luhan will not like his gift. Everyone, including Luhan, will just laugh at Sehun’s worthless present.

In one swift motion, Sehun bolts up from his seat, startling everyone who is watching the scene before running towards the door to get out.

 

 

 

“Sehunnie cannot do it!” The said boy wails to himself as he runs towards the kindergarten’s mini playground. Hot tears pooled in his eyes, threatening to fall any passing second. The kid ignores the cold breeze blowing against his cheeks, too preoccupied with the knowledge that he just embarrassed himself on front of his crush.

For the first time in the five years of his existence, Oh Sehun felt that he is a failure. He aces their recitations, answers their exams in no time, reads the fastest in their class, feels superior among his peers and successfully cuts off any nonsense remark coming from the beagle line. But here he is now, on a cold day of December, wallowing in self-pity because he failed to man up on front of his crush. All his plans of looking cool while giving his gift to Luhan and pecking his cheek on front of the whole class went down the drain because he panicked.

“I’m stupid,” the boy mumbles to himself, not minding that it is not a really nice word to say in his age. He just wants to go home, run to his mother and make himself wasted with bubble tea. Perhaps, he should transfer to another kindergarten—in the last two months of his school year, mind you—and never show himself to his Hannie—

“Sehunnie!” A melodious sound of another child’s voice rings through Sehun’s ears, making him stiff on his seat on the swing. He looks up to see a cute little deer trudging towards him. Sehun’s own coat lies on the little cherub's short arms while he is holding the heavy box that contains Sehun’s gift. Sehun gapes when Luhan is finally standing on front of him. Luhan is panting, and he is not wearing his Santa hat and coat, making Sehun instantly worried. The Chinese boy drops the box on the ground before handing Sehun his coat.

“Why are you here, Hunnie?” Sehun does not know how the nickname made his heart dance and his stomach feel funny and fluttery all of a sudden. He opens his mouth to speak, but he only managed to look like a gaping fish because of nervousness. How could he not be if his crush slash puppy love is staring at him with his doe-like eyes, gleaming in what seems to be a glint of concern? Luhan looks like he is about to spill his tears, and it alarmed Sehun.

“W-Why is Luhannie crying?” He himself is surprised on how he casually pulled Luhan’s hands—which have no gloves—to make him come closer. Sehun stands, not minding his coat that fell on the snowy ground as he gently lifts his hand to wipe Luhan’s pooling tears.

“L-Luhannie thought that Sehunnie is mad,” the deer juts his bottom lip out, tears falling from his eyes. “Sehunnie ran away when Lulu gave his gift. Perhaps Sehunnie hates Lulu so much.”

“W-What? No!” Sehun’s outburst momentarily startled Luhan, but he was quick to calm Luhan down by thumbing his gushing tears.

Sehun watches as his crush’s plump lips quiver from crying. He does not know whether to laugh at the funny sight or coo on how cute Luhan is becoming so he opts to just pat the boy’s hair, explaining his side, “Sehunnie will never hate Luhannie. In fact… I…”

“Sehunnie what?” Luhan tilts his head to the side in wonder. The hesitance on Sehun’s face causes him to stop his tears. Sehun seems to be glowing red, and Luhan assumes that it is because of the cold.

Instead of answering, Sehun looks down on his clothed hands. He hastily takes the gloves off and slides them down his crush’s ice cold hands. Luhan gasps at this, covering his mouth in shock, and Sehun finally speaks.

“S-Sehunnie… Se-Sehunnie cares for Lulu,” the boy says, and he swears he saw a tint of pink dusting Luhan’s cheeks. “Um… I… yes, care for Lulu.”

“C-Care? Se-Sehunnie cares for Lulu?” Luhan’s lips part in awe, his beautiful eyes widen a fraction at the unexpected statement. “B-But… Sehunnie pushed Lulu away three times…”

“L-Lulu makes Sehunnie nervous,” _okay, why am I confessing?_ “a-and he… I want to be friends with Lulu, too, but…”

“But…?” The deer is getting impatient as seen in his anticipating eyes.

“I… I am n-not good enough,” the taller kid mumbles, getting really shy because his mouth won’t cooperate with what his smart brain wants to say. _So uncool, Oh Sehun._ “Sehunnie thinks too maturely so the other kids see him as an odd one. Luhannie is too good for me… t-too beautiful for me.”

“S-Sehunnie thinks that Luhannie is beautiful?” The bashful Chinese boy asks the blushing Korean one who shyly nods his head before looking away. He can see from the corner of his eye though, that Luhan’s lips split into a happy grin, with a pink tinge dusting his apple cheeks.

“E-Everyone says it. Why are you getting all happy?” The sassy boy crosses his arms, still not staring directly on Luhan’s face because he himself has a stupid smile on his face.

“I-It’s because Sehun says it,” Luhan replies, biting his bottom lip to suppress his squeal.

Sehun faces the boy, finding it hard not to melt into the boy’s cuteness. “Stop being silly. It isn’t like my opinion matters—“

“It does! You matter! Sehunnie matters to Lulu!” The Chinese boy splutters, throwing his hands in the air. “Sehunnie is so cool! He is handsome in whatever he wears. He looks so smart when reading and talking with others. He is so cute when he bites his lip and does this,” Luhan furrows his eyebrows as a demonstration, “when we are answering seatworks. Sehunnie may be a little bit mean to me but Lulu likes Sehunnie so much!”

Sehun’s mind is in chaos. His child-like self is telling him that Luhan just likes him in a childish way, but his matured self is processing the words in a different way. _He likes me. Hannie likes me, too. Luhannie likes me. Hallelujah, thank you._

“M-Me, too." Sehun sees something glow in Luhan's eyes, and decides that he will do anything just to see the pretty glimmer every single day.

Sehun does not know if Luhan understands what Sehun just said. Whatever his interpretation is, Luhan is beaming at him, pulling Sehun into a bone-crushing hug while squealing on his ear.

"Yeay!" Luhan cheers, rubbing his cheek against Sehun's, causing the latter to glow a beet red color. "Luhannie likes Hunnie a lot! Luhannie thought a lot about your gift more than Luhannie did to Minseok!"

"R-Really?" Sehun blinks, pulling away from the deer despite the lingering urge to hug the baby again. Luhan answers him with the sweetest smile Sehun ever saw that had the shy Korean toddler giggling.

He sees rainbows, unicorns, sprinkles and bubble teas once he felt Luhan's clothed hand surrounding his. Sehun lets the shorter boy drag him towards the bench, settling themselves on the plastic surface. Sehun grabs his almost forgotten coat along the way and draped it on Luhan's slightly quivering form. Sehun internally dies because Luhan looks so adorable in the coat which is bigger than his cute size. Luhan flashes him a cheeky grin at what he perceives as a gentlemanly act, making Sehun proud of himself for acquiring it from K-dramas his mother is fond of watching.

Luhan gets up once again because he left the box on the snowy ground. He waddles towards Sehun who helps him because Luhan looks like he is carrying a boulder. Once they are seated, Luhan enthusiastically shoves his own gift towards the other boy, maybe way too much that it almost knocked on Sehun's nose. Sehun's lips curl into a smile as he scans the gift, the wrap covering it full of reindeers. It is a bit heavy, making him wonder how Luhan was able to carry it from the classroom to the playground.

"Lulu will still give you a gift even if Lulu is not your Secret Santa." Sehun imagines Luhan as a dog, wagging his tail excitedly while waiting for Sehun to finish unwrapping. The shy boy finally tears away the last piece from the big box on his lap, and when he opens the lid...

"Hannie, this is..." Sehun gapes at the sight that greets him. He cannot stop the squeal that left his lips because lo and behold, Luhan gave him the treasure he never expected to lay his hands on.

It is a big encyclopedia set, the one that Sehun always coveted from the nearby bookstore. Utility bills are rising lately, so his parents promised him to buy it after New Year. It is expensive and it definitely surpassed the required price of the gift for the Secret Santa. His mind cannot grasp why Lu Han, the Chinese boy he ignored the whole year, cared to spend a great deal of money for a nobody named Oh Sehun.

 

 

_Dang, Oh Sehun is in love._

 

 

"D-Does Sehunnie like it?" Luhan asks nervously. He is fiddling with his clothed fingers, making him a hundred times more adorable, at least in a lovestruck Sehun's eyes. "Mama told Lulu that the best gifts for smart kids are books, so..."

"But an _encyclopedia?_ Omo… T-Thank you so much, Luhannie." Lord knows how much the kid like to cover Luhan's lovable face with pecks just like how Sehun does to his mother.

"I wish to read it together with Sehunnie," Luhan sheepishly smiles, to which Sehun nods enthusiastically.

Though, it soon melted as he remembered about his own gifts. What if Luhan finds his gift... _gifts,_ cheap? Sehun suddenly feels so small and insecure again, the worst case scenarios playing in his mind.

Luhan seems to notice the milky baby's distress, so he pokes Sehun's cheek with his finger.

"Sehunnie is my Secret Santa, isn't he?" Luhan beams at him and Sehun wonders why the snow is not melting at the sunny smile.

"Wha-What if Lu-Luhannie does not like my gift?" Sehun asks, pouting. "Their gifts are way better than mine."

"I like everything that comes from Sehunnie," Luhan answers with a giggle. "Lulu wants to see it, Sehunnie."

Sehun is about to shake his head but Luhan already shot him straight to the heart with his endearing aegyo. Luhan lowers his head to make his eyes bigger while bringing his fists on his cheeks for a 'bbuing bbuing.'

Sehun sighs in resignation as he pulls his bag, unzipping it to get the hidden paper bag from inside.

"I-I hope you l-like it." Sehun mutters more to himself when Luhan screams while getting the present. He giggles while staring at the reindeer design on the paper bag and opens it.

"Woah!" Luhan pulls out the Bambi plushie from the bag, bringing it to his chest to cuddle it. Luhan is all-smiles while nuzzling its fine fur, the fact alone that it came from the one who makes his stomach feel funny and his heart beat crazily enough to make him merry.

"Sehunnie, how did you know that this is my favorite?" The shorter boy squeals while hugging the toy tightly.

 _I overheard it when you were talking to Minseok._ "I-I did not know. All I knew is that you look like Bambi," Sehun explains, a smile on his lips. He pulls out the headband with deer antlers from the paper bag, putting it on top of Luhan's head. Sehun also wraps the deer's neck with a Rilakkuma scarf, careful not to choke the precious sweetheart in his care.

Luhan's face further lit up at this and Sehun feels like he is losing more and more oxygen. It seems like his face will rip on how long he is smiling. He does not even smile this much during his birthday parties so no wonder the kid is surprised with himself.

"How do I look?" Luhan grins, adjusting the deer antlers on his fluffy hair. He sniffs the scarf, giggling at the powdery scent.

"Just like a cute baby deer," Sehun honestly answers that earned him a pinch on his cheek. He could not bring himself to get annoyed though, because the smile on Luhan's face is making Sehun feel bubbly inside.

"Is there more?" Luhan fumbles the bag and squeals when he saw a colorful cube. He unwraps it in no time, marveled by the Christmas themed design on it.

"What is this, Sehunnie?" He raises the cube in the air, twirling it to see the other designs when Sehun gently gets it from him. Sehun slightly distorts the order of the candy cane, Santa and reindeer designs before solving it on front of Luhan's eyes.

"It is a Rubik's cube." A grin is plastered on Sehun's face as he proudly gives it back to Luhan. The latter is amazed at the taller boy's skills, and he promises himself to play it once he comes home.

"Oh, oh, a Christmas card!" Luhan sets the toys aside to see what the card says. Luhan’s face bloomed when he smelled the colorful Christmas card’s scented fragrance. When he flipped it open, Sehun is sweating once again. This is the day; the day Oh Sehun confesses his feelings to a certain baby deer named Lu Han.

 

 

_Dec. 17, 2017_

 

_Little Deer,_

 

_Sehunnie hopes that you liked his gifts. Sehunnie does not know what to give to someone precious like you. It seems like Luhannie has everything he wants in this world. He has Mr. and Mrs. Lu who love him dearly. He has Minseok by his side. He has the whole kindergarten doting on him. He is talented, smart, adorable and lovable unlike Sehunnie. Sehunnie feels so small around you._

 

Luhan blinks at this. "How can you feel smaller if you are taller than me?"

 

_Lulu makes my wits go out of the window. I do not know what to say at you despite how smart you think I am._

 

The Chinese boy’s eyebrows furrows at this, his nose involuntarily crinkling. "Go out of the window? Wits? Huh? Why not use the door, Sehunnie?"

 _‘So help me Lord,’_ Sehun thinks while making Luhan read again.

 

_When Lulu smiles, Sehunnie secretly smiles. Sehunnie feels his heart drumming against his chest when Luhan flashes his smile. Sehunnie’s face gets warm when he stares at Luhannie. I do not know how a boy can be so beautiful. But of course, my Eomma is still more beautiful... but I swear Hannie is the second. Also, Lulu’s voice is the most beautiful music in Sehunnie’s ears. When he sings Minseokkie a lullaby, Sehunnie feels jealous. He also wants to hear Luhan sing for him. When Hannie laughs with the others, Sehunnie badly wants to join them but he is so shy._

 

Sehunnie snickers when he saw Luhan glow a beet red color. The Chinese boy’s lips split into a grin as his sparkling eyes scan through the letter. His eyes crinkle as he momentarily beams at Sehun before continuing reading the heartfelt letter.

Sehun watches as the boy’s soft tuff of hair becomes more covered with some snow. The Chinese toddler, more like a baby, looks so endearing especially with the permanent smile and blush gracing his features. Sehun knows he is smitten and does not mind falling deeper for the beautiful angel on front of him.

 

_Now, Hannie, all I can give you is my heart. Can you accept it?_

 

“Sehunnie, how can you give Lulu your heart?” Luhan asks, confusion lacing his features. “If you do that, you will die. I do not want Sehunnie to die."

Sehun facepalms at this. Perhaps, he needs to wait for a couple of years for his crush to understand what the words the matured baby put in it. _Maybe next time, I will practice how to write like the children my age. Well at least, he does want me to die. Hihi._

 

_Sehunnie will always be there watching you. Sehunnie will protect you from bad guys! Sehunnie will study hard so he can graduate on time and have work so he can give Luhan as much taro bubble tea and Bambi plushies he likes. When we grow up, I will give Hannie the diamond ring Sehunnie saw in the internet. You like that, Lu? Sehunnie will try his best to improve himself, so when the time comes, I will ask for your hand from your parents..._

 

"What can I use to do things if I only have one hand?" Luhan pouts, and Sehun mentally bangs his head on the nearby slide.

 

_...and stay with you, Pinku Pinku, Rilakkuma, and Bambi forever. Merry Christmas, Luhannie. I hope that you enjoy the vacation. I will miss you. See you after the New Year. <3_

 

 _\- Oh Sehun_ (>'o’)> ♥ <('o’<)

 

"Thank you so much, Sehunnie!" Luhan throws his short arms around the boy, smothering his face with kisses. Sehun can only feel hot all over as he lets himself be showered with pecks all over his face. _Ahhh, this is even more heavenly than bathing in bubble tea._

"D-Do you like my gifts?" Sehun asks between the kisses. Luhan nods with his eyes crinkling to crescents.

“More than Minseok's?”

“A lot more, Sehunnie.”

“More than the other kids…” Sehun trails off, his eyes shifting every now and then. “Even m-more than Jongin’s?”

“This silly boy,” Luhan chuckles while pinching Sehun’s cheeks, making the taller kid wince. “Ouch, Hannie—”

“I am not really into gadgets,” Luhan says, “Hannie is more of an outdoor person. He prefers kicking balls rather than playing with Angry Birds and Candy Crush. I like reading story books more than playing games, too.”

“B-But—”

“Luhannie will make sure to cuddle Bambi to sleep.”

Baby Oh beams at this, causing Luhan to squeal and squish his cheeks more. “Hurts.”

“Sorry,” Luhan giggles before letting go of the other. “Hunnie, the others may be looking for us. Teacher Seo told Lulu to take Sehunnie back immediately.”

“Ah, yes,” Sehun laughs awkwardly, giving Luhan one last hug before pulling away. “It’s getting cold, too. Sehunnie does not want Lulu to get sick.”

The two children giggle at this. They gather their gifts for each other, with Sehun’s knapsack on his back and the heavy box on his hands while the paper bag is held by Luhan. They waddle their way towards the kindergarten’s door, with Sehun taking a halt before it.

“Luhannie,” he starts, his voice filled with guilt and remorse, “can you forgive Sehunnie for what he did? Can we… can we be friends? Sehunnie promises that he won’t be a meanie anymore. He will always share his things, even his bubble tea, and make Hannie happy.”

Little Luhan’s face is unreadable, making Sehun scared of what the other kid’s reaction will be. He closes his eyes, ready to be rejected when Luhan plants a big smooch on his cheek.

“Of course!” Luhan cheers, giggling, pleased with himself for momentarily scaring Sehun. “Hannie waited for this day since he met Sehunnie!”

Sehun’s eyes flicker towards the mistletoe hanging under the door, and an idea forms in his small, brilliant mind.

“Luhannie.”

“Hm?” Luhan hears the box dropping from Sehun’s hands.

 

 

Ice cold hands sweep the bangs off Luhan's forehead, the freezing touch replaced by the warmth left by a soft pair of lips.

 

 

For a boy who just showered the slightly taller kid with pecks, Sehun is surprised to see Luhan’s face turning into tomato just by a kiss on the forehead. The Korean boy let his lips linger on the deer’s forehead before pulling away to press his lips on the boy’s cheeks.

“Merry Christmas, baby deer. Sehunnie loves you.”

 

 

The children may not have realized it, but they gave each other a greater gift: the seed of sprouting fondness in their hearts. Perhaps, it is their naïvety and unripe age that hinder them from understanding the tiny budding affection that they always have for one another.

Maybe, after a few more winters, springs, summers and autumn, their friendship may bloom into something better...

 

 

Something sweeter than Christmas cookies.

 

 

Something warmer than woolen sweaters and scarves.

 

 

Something more exciting than receiving a nicely wrapped present.

 

 

Something more surreal than seeing Santa riding his sleigh with his reindeers.

 

 

Something more spellbinding than the snowy streets filled with bright lit trees, colorful garlands and balls, and beaming faces...

 

 

 

Something called _love._

 

 


End file.
